A year in review

Well, apparently I can say I've finished a year of grad school. That makes me feel old. So what does a year of grad school entail?

#1. Balanced Living.
I have no fear for myself in living a balanced lifestyle. Because if I can do that in grad school, I'm pretty sure I can do it anywhere. Movie nights? check. Frequent playing of games? check. Still getting good grades? check. Still love Jesus? check. I think I wrote those in the exact opposite order they should go in ... In any case, I do worry about those around me. Mostly if they are deciding to be pastors. If they choose to be academics and PhD's then by all means, lock-up in the library and solve the historical crises of the world (are there really such things?). But if we are called to the church, then the question becomes, what is the church while we are here at seminary? And that is a lot to consider. We have our field education placements, and our involvement with Sunday worship if we aren't in field ed. But if we place our focus there, we've tended to our 'church' needs just as the general world does. My Sunday/weekly ritual of spiritual involvement. If this is truly a seminary in which we are living into the call to be God's people, God's hands and feet, then potentially it should be the most enriching, edifying, and corporately empowering place in the world. Yes it's a grad school, but if we are studying missiology and practical theology, shouldn't it be our response to live it out? I don't understand. The lack of involvement in student organizations or events. The lack of motivation to build our community into a true Christian community. It seems there is no escaping those who would rather sit back and point out the problems in a community, rather than 'be the change you wish to see in the world' (Ghandi). What if in some way we are called to be catalysts. Why isn't a seminary the hub from which change pours?

#2. Milkshakes.
Not the kind that brings all the boys to the yard, but the delectable ones that involve chocolate and vanilla, and cooling off on hot days. Milkshakes are delicious, and a delicious way to hang out with people. And a delicious reward for playing an excellent game of Euchre. Perhaps at PTS, milkshakes proved to be a nice forced break for people. Stop what you're doing, talk a walk to halo pub with some of your favorite people, and grab a cold one (or, what I prefer to a 'cold one'). I think it's also just a nice reminder of how we should take time out of our busy schedules to spend time with one another. Dorms offer instant community. As do dining halls. Milkshakes make you work for your outing, set aside some time, put some effort into spending time with people. I like that.

#3. I like the word 'transitive'.
Change is always occuring. The other day Hillary (and Heraclitus?) said the only constant is change (of course I refuted that with gravity, but I'm pretty sure I know what she meant). I love change and I hate change. Change means people are different, places are different, with different people in them. That can be beautiful and terrible. I love meeting new people, but I hate losing the ones that I already love. And keeping in touch is hard, not to mention impossible when change involves death. But I am of the age of transition. Graduation, job hunting, opportunities, travel, volunteering. Young/Emerging adults are transitive. So how do we stay grounded?

#4. Most technology is self centered. Doesn't that make our culture self centered?
iphone/me-phone. Facebook/keep-up-with-me. Blog/my-other-thoughts. Twitter/now-you-know-when-I-go-to-the-bathroom. Myspace/myspace. Everything is virtual which makes us virtually interact with everything and everyone. At a recent conference we discussed how self-focused young/Emerging adults are, but when does our culture grow out of it? It seems like 'today' is reinforcing our self-focused habits more than ever. I'm writing a blog for heaven's sake. I'm gonna go spend some time in my journal. And a real book. And maybe a newspaper.

Oh, I suppose #5. I love home.

Holy Week: a Reflection

A foot washing service puts the attendee in an interesting position - the beauty of serving one another and remembering how Christ served/s us ... while also letting someone touch your feet. And feet are a delicate issue! I sat at the service on Thursday evening, tucked away behind the piano, offering contemplative music while my friends and peers took turns washing each others feet in the way that Jesus did before Passover. In silence (aside from the sound of my keys) an individual would take a seat, their feet next to a bowl, and in silence another individual would rise and come to them, place their feet in the bowl and proceed to wash them. There was no set order, nor forceful coercion to have each persons feet washed. It was an ebb and flow of service. I know many who passed up this opportunity for the very awkwardness of the task - either I am washing - touching - someone else's feet, or they are washing mine. But perhaps it is this awkwardness that helps us today to understand a little more the radical nature of what Jesus did. And we need to let ourselves experience the awkwardness in the same way that Jesus ask us to accept his act of servitude. Man, what a guy.

I can't remember if I've ever been to a Passion play before. I've been to my fair share of Easter Services, but I cannot recall a Passion play. Trinity Episcopal put one on, starring the best and brightest of their youth - I'd say the range in age was about 3-12. I didn't know what I was in for! There was of course the joy in seeing a child memorize their lines, the humor in seeing centurion soldiers wave at their parents in the audience, but I did not anticipate the jarring sensation of experiencing a multitude of children screaming 'Crucify Him!' at the top of their lungs. One moment they are smiling, half paying attention, and the next they are exactly that crowd in front of Pilate, bartering their savior for a murderer. However disturbing it may have been, I think it accurately portrayed what happened that day so many years ago. We all know how a crowd can take on it's own personality, luring it's members into unison, whether or not they understand what it is they are doing - the adrenaline and the movement is just too appetizing. And then it always leaves you with the question, where would I be in that multitude, mouth shut or fist in the air? ...

I have always had an admiration for the Lutherans, so for Good Friday I joined them for a service. I think Good Friday services are simply great. Perhaps it's just a recognition that in church we are never given the opportunity to sit and reflect on a passage. We are read the passage, and then told what it means or how we should try and think about it (at least for that week). But how refreshing, to read the Passion narrative for what it is, and sit in it for a while. I think we should do that more. We are much too uncomfortable in silence. How many times do I experience 'moments' for silent prayer that let me get as far as 'dear Lord' in my mind and are then interrupted by the lay leader giving the communal prayer. Let's sit in silence with our Lord.

What ARE you supposed to do on Holy Saturday?

HE IS RISEN!! What a joy to proclaim that to my peers on Easter. I may be on a seminary campus, but I do not feel the freedom to pronounce God's greatness and faithfulness to friends as I pass them by on a daily basis. Nor do I feel that excitement about Jesus would even be warmly welcomed. But on Easter, the doors are open, and the joy is free flowing. I LOVE being able to proclaim that HE is Risen and be affirmed by those passing by. A different way to share the peace. Oh, and I went to my first Sun-Rise Easter service - 5 in the morning, yet phenomenal. I have to admit though, I think the 3-hour nap afterwords really completed it.

And now it is time for finals. I do believe that Jesus saves, and therefore I cling to the hope that some grace will be extended to these exams ...

63 Degrees, I'll Take What I Can Get.

I made this card for my friend Erin, but I thought I'd share my sentiments at the moment. I want Spring. But, I fear this may be an overzealous desire, as I don't know if I want to sign myself up for whatever a 'Jersey Spring' might have to offer. I like my 'predictable' Seattle weather, and in that sense, that I know how to layer appropriately. Are we going to experience the kind of humidity that makes it hard to breath? No thanks. But today it was sunny with a high of 63, so the Seattlite in me threw on a pair of shorts and my Birkenstocks.

In other news, I experienced for the first time the phenomena of 'Bowlioke', which is in fact karaoke at a bowling alley. I have no idea why I haven't seen this before. But let's just mention that I may have sung Britney Spears, as well as High School Musical, and so it was a full evening.

My life has been otherwise occupied with The Tempest. PTS is putting on a production of it which will be performed next week, and most of my evenings in the past month have been overridden with props and pretending to be a sea nymph, whatever that means. All I know is I dance around like waves in the ocean, or bark like a dog ... a graduate student indeed.

The effects of the hot glue gun are astounding.

I acquired a new toy. The hot glue gun. I do believe I have wanted one ever since I knew they existed. I am now a proud owner. What finally pushed me over, you ask? Art day in Pennsylvania is what I would like to call it. We visited a studio in PA that may or may not have been what I would think heaven is like. Every craft you can think of - paint, tissue paper, nick-nacks, glue, pastels, charcoal, enough brushes to last you a lifetime. So what did I do with such a gift? I ...
... and I ...
It was fabulous. And now I can't stop doing art, which is dangerous because I still have work to do. Granted, it is a 'reading week' which means no classes, and essentially people take it as a spring break, but I would like to do SOME studying. :) We'll see ...

Women's Art Show

I think I will entitle it 'Surrender'. Title somewhat inspired by the Downhere song 'Surrender', but concept for work my own. The show's theme is 'Restricted Expressions' - expression we find to be restricted in the church tradition ... so interpret it how you will. I really want to explore more with mixed media.

If I could write the world a song.

I wish I was more of a writer. Doesn't it seem that the strengths you wish for yourself aren't the strengths you've been given? I have a passion for writing music, I just don't know how or what I would write. So I have a passion for wanting to write music. I think it comes out of a dislike for the worship music we hear over and over again at gatherings. Which is kind of funny in itself, because I would probably complain if only songs I didn't know were played - unless they were great songs with a solid sound and thoughtful lyrics. Which is what I would love to write. I think it's a desire for contemporary hymns. I'm obsessed with the song 'This Road' by Jars of Clay, of which the lyrics are:

All heavy laden acquainted with sorrow
May Christ in our marrow, carry us home
From alabaster come blessings of laughter
A fragrance of passion and joy from the truth

Grant the unbroken tears ever flowing
From hearts of contrition only for You
May sin never hold true that love never broke through
For God's mercy holds us and we are His own

This road that we travel, may it be the straight and narrow
God give us peace and grace from You, all the day
Shelter with fire, our voices we raise still higher
God give us peace and grace from You, all the day through

---I love it. I find myself picking up my guitar as a 'break' from studying which generally lasts longer than anything that should be called a break. I also 'helped' lead worship last night at our 'contemporary' worship service - I say 'helped' because no one came, and I say 'contemporary' because the songs were all circa 2001. Now, here is the dilemma. We sat brainstorming what should be done to encourage people to come, and amidst encouraging better advertising, I feel a need to move towards better songs. There are some newer songs that I love, and would love to bring to corporate worship. But isn't there a problem when I start loving songs? Once I was told, 'careful Becca, don't worship the worship'. It was in jest at the time, but those words have stuck with me because I easily love music, and I wonder sometimes if I enjoy worship music at gatherings because I love the music or if I'm really worshiping God. It can be hard to separate the two.

I know there are times when I have felt totally free during a worship service to praise God or be honest with God, and not be distracted by the voices around me, but distinctly touched by the words we sing, understanding what they really mean. And I hope that's what I can offer, that if I am worshiping through these pieces so can those who gather with me. Perhaps I should just stop worrying about what other people want in a worship service, and recognize that God works amidst our body of believers. Most of the time it really is us allowing ourselves to let go of ourselves and be listeners to and participants in something that is greater than ourselves.

Pheeling Phaint Phor Photographs

I have a love and not-hate-but-somewhat-dislike for photography.

I would love to take photography all day every day every where and all the time. You can be so artistic with shots, and creative with angles, colors, patterns, people/faces, etc. But at the same time you're only capturing a moment, and not even a moment if you think about it - it is a flat representation of reduced reality. This is why we moan and groan on family vacations when the designated photographer must document as much as possible. The rest of us pull at our hair, make faces, and present our case that we should be enjoying the time we have, not by taking pictures, but by actually making the memories. In the end I think we all are a little thankful that certain events do get plastered to the paper, despite the agonizing minute it took for the picture to be taken.

My not-hate-but-somewhat-dislike side comes in when I think about how meaningful the subjects of the photo are. With nature or inanimate objects I have no real opinion, but when people enter the frame everything changes. To photograph someone is such a blessing and a curse - you have an opportunity to attempt to capture them - and I mean them - in a single spot for eternity. To try and communicate who they are through a still image. This is a challenge, but part of me also thinks it's a disgrace. You can't hold a conversation with a photograph, laugh with a photograph (well perhaps you can, but you will look quite strange doing so), build memories with a photograph ... I guess when I see photos of people, it makes me ache to know them. Especially if the photographer has captured them in a unique way - and then I wish that photographs could respond. Perhaps J.K. Rowling wishes the same thing.

Back from 'break'. A week of no classes when the dining hall closes and there is still work to be done doesn't really sound like a break, but I'll take what I can get. I did finish a book, I spent some time in Pennsylvania, and watched a few movies, which is what break is all about.

Now it's back to classes. And I'm excited. It's always nice to see all the familiar faces back on campus (since many were absent over Jan-term) but it's also got me thinking about how I want to engage my seminary experience. A friend and I have decided that Wednesdays over breakfast we will come together with whoever would like to join us, and discuss theological issues. It's basically "let's talk about our frustrations/questions dealing with theology/whatever else we hear here in class that we have not yet unpacked" time. A time that I wanted to designate, because often at meals people are having time to zone away from classes. And in small groups you get a bit more personal. And I want to utilize the time here to ask my peers questions about salvation and Jesus and spiritual warfare. So, today we met and it was great. One reason I'm excited.

And one cultural comment about seminary for today. I don't think I've mentioned this one before, sorry if I have. It feels as though there is a sort of grasping onto pieces of the world - as in holding onto any and all secularity (just made that word up). It's almost as if it's uncool to proclaim a love for Jesus, which seems so backwards. This doesn't go for everyone, but it seems pretty commonplace. It more just makes me feel like we're taking this weird Christian community thing for granted. We don't have to live all goody-two-shoes Christian, I mean, honesty doesn't have to look good. But we also don't have to head the other direction. I guess I'm just hoping (and this will probably seem random) that people are really engaging who they are and who they want to be, who God is calling them to be, and are not giving in to who they think they are supposed to be.

Music and Poetry

Because some people know how to sing/say it better than I do.

Instead of a Show - Jon Foreman

I hate all your show and pretense
the hypocrisy of your praise
the hypocrisy of your festivals
I hate all your show

Away with your noisy worship
Away with your noisy hymns
I stop up my ears when your
singing ‘em
I hate all your show

Instead let there be a flood of justice
An endless procession of righteous living, living
Instead let there be a flood of justice
Instead of a show

your eyes are closed when you’re praying
you sing right along with the band
you shine up your shoes for services
but there’s blood on your hands

you turned your back on the homeless
and the ones that don’t fit in your plans
quit playing religion games
there’s blood on your hands

Ah! let’s argue this out
if your sins are blood red
let’s argue this out
you’ll be white as the clouds
let’s argue this out
quit fooling around

give love to the ones who can’t love at all
give hope to the ones who got no hope at all
stand up for the ones who can’t stand up at all
instead of a show
I hate all your show

Coming to God: First Days - Mary Oliver

Lord, what shall I do that I
can't quiet myself?
Here is the bread, and
here is the cup, and
I can't quiet myself.

To enter the language of transformation!
To learn the importance of stillness,
with one's hands folded!

When will my eyes of rejoicing turn peaceful?
When will my joyful feet grow still?
When will my heart stop its prancing
as over the summer grass?

Lord, I would run for you, loving the miles for your sake.
I would climb the highest tree
to be that much closer.

Lord, I will learn also to kneel down
into the world of the invisible,
the inscrutable and the everlasting.
Then I would move no more than the leaves of a tree
on a day of no wind,
bathed in light,
like a wanderer who has come home at last
and kneels in peace, done with all unnecessary things;
every motion; even words.

Janu-airy

Short terms are interesting. This is my first experience with one, and I'm not sure what I think about it. Cramming 10 weeks of information into less than 3 is quite a task, and staying awake for 3hrs of lecture every day does prove to be a challenge for me. I very greatly appreciate the class (Presbyterian History and Theology), but also the extra's that accompany this short term.

During a usual semester, we have the opportunity to attend Chapel every day at 11:30. But during the shorter term, we have morning prayer/evening prayer options. I decided to go to morning prayer the first week, which is itself dedication as it is at 8:30am - perhaps not early for you but early enough for me. :) The style of the service is from the Book of Common Prayer which in essence means high liturgy and very structured. My first impression was that it was rather dry - to read in response words printed for you on paper, to hear the monotonous voices surrounding you droning through the Apostle's Creed, and the pristine words of the speaker that have lost most of their conversational quality in the attempt to present a more holy atmosphere.

But is this not the epitome of judgement?

As I vented my self-righteous opinions about how I like to worship, Margaret was good enough to point out to me how much I was missing the point. What is worship? What does it mean to pray? What is prayer? I found myself swimming in the terrible current trend of 'what's in it for me?'. I can't stand that. I was looking for what I wanted. I was focusing on how I worship. I wasn't listening or praying about anything really, I was too distracted with what I wanted to get out of it. Why is there so much me all the time? How do I find myself there so often?

Well, I've been back. Every day. It has been glorious. I can't explain it, it's as though that first day I had the evil spirit of criticism hovering over my shoulder that wouldn't let me experience the Holy Spirit in that place. My mind open, my heart refreshed, the words on the page mean something different. The practice of speaking the scriptures with my brothers and sisters is a new experience. Worship and prayer are bigger than I am. How marvelous.

It makes me appreciate structure in some ways - how we may not want to do something, yet should do something. When we don't feel like praying, perhaps that is the best time to pray. Although I may not like the service at a church, let's look for God in it anyway, because He's there, and I just need to listen or pay attention. Let's all get off our high horses about wanting what we want, and try wanting what we've got.

As Time Goes By ... this is not your mother's british sitcom.

Nearly a month. And New Years passed. Weeks of leaving you in anticipation of what I'm up to (yeah right) + New Years MUST = countdown.

10. Christmas needs a caroling.


9. One of the times I tried to take the bus. As most of you know (like I really know who 'you' are) that Seattle has difficulty operating when it snows. The whole city suffers from this. But this day was just a little cold, and a little icy. So what gives? My bus was late. I had places to be. So I drove. But I still miss my old bus stop, almost as much as my bus missed me ... which was by about 10-15min. In any case, it wasn't as bad as the second time I waited, in a good deal of snow, for a shuttle that only appears once an however-long-it-takes-to-loop-the-neighborhood. Rescheduled THAT coffee date.

8. The San Diego Zoo has been an obsession, dream, and hope in the past 15 years of my life. This winter, that dream became a reality. And this is proof - a baby panda sleeping in a tree. It wasn't exactly like the interactive CD-ROM I received from my uncle so many years ago, it was simply better.
7. Sisters. This picture speaks for itself.
6. DISNEYLAND. AT CHRISTMAS. Need I say more? Aside from the fact that Nathan looks hilarious in this photo? Was he unprepared for the fun he was about to have that day? Possibly. Bonus: Innoventions - High School Musical Karaoke. You're right, I did need to say more.
5. Family attack! Let's just say the last time I slept in this house was when I was ... 5? That's much too long. I love my Aunt and Uncle. If you ever get a chance, visit Madrona Marsh. And if you ever get chance, play stinky pinky. It's a riddle/word game, that apparently means a lot of harsher things when you google it, so better just ask me about it ...
4. Family ... again ... and they should really be at #1 but since this is more of a timeline than a countdown, and they've already got #5 and #7, I think you get the picture. But really, THIS picture explains my family.
3. When I come home, I often smell like coffee shops. I actually went straight from Javasti to Zoka one day. But I love meeting with people! They are so interesting, you should get to know some. Catching up is the best. I am so thankful for the questions asked, the feelings expressed, the laughs shared, and the way my heart feels full.
2. That's one way to say goodbye - how often does Mt. Rainier actually show up to wave goodbye? My Great Aunt and Great...Cousin (?) have visited a number of times, and I think it was only on visit #4 that it actually showed up and wasn't covered in clouds.
1. And we're back. Class? Presbyterian History and Theology. Actually much more interesting than that groan you just let out. But I am here with a new perspective - reminded of what life at home is like, in some ways a refresher of who I am and what gives me life. And here I am asking myself if I'm living like that here. I think overall I feel a lack of spiritual fervor. I don't want to judge, and it's literally impossible when talking about other people's spiritual lives, but sometimes I just feel like theres a lack of energy for the gospel, no real recognition of the wonderful gift we have been given, first in Christ, and then in the fact we get to study all that follows from Him! I just want to see that faith is real to people. Maybe I need to show people that my faith is real to me.

I Found the Rain down in Southern California ... like Toto only different ...

You know how sometimes when you go shopping, and you somehow end up looking at the TV's and you have about a 5 min standstill because you can't believe how big they are and you just have to take a moment to take it all in ... my Sis and bro-in-law have one of those. And right now I cannot think of a better way to really kick off my Christmas break than watch movies on this giant, and I am quickly realizing everyone and their mother is in the movie Galaxy Quest.I'm in San Diego, enjoying the rain? This weather is wacky - 50 degrees in Jersey, snow in Seattle, rain in San Diego, what is going on. Either way, finals are over and I've finished my first semester in Seminary! I came home Sunday, and it was fabulous. I was able to catch up with some friends Monday and left Tuesday for San Diego!

Coming from a life elsewhere and returning home brings with it many contemplations.
#1. Not only do I get asked how seminary is, but I have to say I feel some pressure to qualify my school. At home the stigma it has of purely academic and lacking ministerial qualities runs rampant. Or at least at times it feels that way, but it could very well be one of those things you always feel you need to justify when really people are just curious. Either way, I really love my school. It isn't perfect, but then again what is perfect? It has it's problems, as we all do, which in some ways makes me think it's healthy. I don't know exactly what people are looking for in a seminary as a whole, because just like everything else you're going to find a problem with it, and then the question is really - what are you going to do when the problem arises? If you want to know more, let's meet for coffee. But bottom line, I am truly enjoying my seminary experience.

#2. Sexism. I've always realized it as an issue, but not until now have I really seen it as my issue. In academia I feel like it's almost healthy competition - to show equal aptitude (if not superior :) ...), or not even take genders into account but function simply student to student. But I don't see how that can really happen in the real world. Gender always plays a role. I realize race as well, but we'll leave that for another time. Earlier this semester we had moderators from PCUSA's General Assembly come for a Q & A, and one lady raised a point about how sexism is still an issue - as men and women graduate with their MDivs, and start looking/waiting for a call, male candidates find placements quickly while women who are equally capable and in some cases more so, are still waiting. I don't really need to start worrying about this for a couple years, but the fact that this is still an issue is surprising. Perhaps a more fitting complaint would center around dress code. Just think about it. For working in a church, or any profession really, the expected appropriate attire always seems a few steps up for the female. Skirts, heels, fitted shirts/blouses. And this in relation to a man's polo shirt and trousers? hmmmm ... All this to say I don't have a solution. I know this country is making changes, and I know that in individual cases it isn't that big of a problem, but it's still a problem. Just another one of those hurtles in life, I guess. I just know that some day I want to write a book - a book so good people can't ignore how good it is, and therefore won't really even care who wrote it but will just be thankful it has been written.

#3 How do you make sure to be yourself wherever you are? I can never be completely sure. There are always those small things you forget about yourself until you're around those people who bring it out in you. Hooray for sisters!

Bostacular

Thanksgiving - Boston style. I really like Boston. I think I could move there and be happy. Granted, I could probably move a lot of places and be happy, but it's such a nice size for a city, and nearly surrounded by water which is fabulous. I miss seeing a lot of water around. OH Seattle - only two more weeks before home-time!

Anyway, I went with my suite-mate Margaret to visit her Uncle and cousins, which was really fun, and it was fun to simply be in a family atmosphere. We didn't get to see as much of Boston as I would have like (like Cambridge for instance ...) but that just means I'll have to go back! It's amazing how much history can be in one place. I mean I've been to Europe, but this is like birth-place-of-our-country history. In a sense all of this only existed in my 7th-12th grade US history memory. Now it's alive again! And just like it looks like in National Treasure ...

So now back to work ... I actually am quite busy this week. I joined a group on campus called Seminarians for Peace and Justice, and as today is/was World AIDS Day, we organized a Taize service in the Chapel. Along with that, I organized the Alternative Christmas Market, where we are selling fair trade products and alternative gifts (like $10 donated to the Trenton Area Soup Kitchen), which is awesome but needless to say, a little time consuming. Here are some of my products, if you're interested ...

The bottlecap earrings I've made to support my friend who's living in Bosnia (thus 'Bottlecaps for Bosnia'). I love making stuff. And the card on lower right I designed to go with donations to local organizations. I love making stuff. Did I mention that? Hmm ...

I also took a fabulous walk today with my friend Rachel Daley. She is fabulous, and all around very much fun. I like seminary a lot. I love learning what I'm learning, engaging in heavy theological and ethical discussions, and generally this community. Also challenging a community like this to be aware of the world around them (locally and globally) through things like the Alt Christmas Market or the Taize service. We need to be agents of change. And that goes for each member of the body of Christ, not just those destined to be the workers in the church, but definitley them for sure.
Oh and please pray for me, I'm suffering from a severe case of camera lust. I love love LOVE photography, and would LOVE a new camera. But if I had one I probably wouldn't get ANYTHING done.

Uh oh ...

The Word of the Lord:

"Hear, my child, and be wise.
and direct your mind in the way.
Do not be among winebibbers,
or among gluttonous eaters of meat;
for the drunkard and the glutton will come to poverty,
and drowsiness will clothe them with rags."
-Proverbs 23:19-21

Thanks be to God.

Well, given my last entry - apparently partially about winebibbers - and given my addiction to buffalo wings (and the way I inhaled them last night), the outlook is grim. Yet on the other hand, maybe it all makes sense, because no one goes into ministry for the money ... well, I mean I could probably name a few ...

Pictures for fun:
I forgot to mention a Hodge Hall tradition - we have a painting at the base of the stairs that is re-done each year, themed for the girls from our floor, and painted in community. Hooray for floor art!
Hello fall! Miller Chapel from the inside and out. Apparently it made Martha Stewart's top 10 places to get married ...? I don't think she realizes half the congregation won't be able to see anything ... but it is gorgeous!

I just don't understand these phenomenons ...

1. Karaoke - カラオケ
What is it about our age bracket that screams 'let's sing in front of strangers!'?!? In perusing facebook photo albums of my peers, and seeing the culture first hand (yes I went, but I have yet to sing ... apparently it's only a matter of time) it just seems that the 'just graduated college' crowd through to probably 'I'm gonna have kids soon' age have a fascination with Karaoke. It's just strange. Especially since whoever made up the books for Karaoke should have been edited, by the 'these songs should NEVER be sung at karaoke because they are too long and slow and long' editor. But that apparently did not happen. Most of the time it feels like that bad dj you experienced at a wedding once. Playing somebody's classic song of romance that no one wants to dance to, or can even remember the words too.

2. Beer, Beer, and more Beer,
I can understand a beer. Maybe a couple beers. But when it becomes a 'necessity' for having fun, or rather the phrase turns into, 'I haven't had enough beer to party yet' --- What is that about? If you like the taste of beer, you shouldn't be abusing the amount of it. And at parties, people delude themselves into thinking a party isn't a party unless you have alcohol. What? Are you sure? Have you ever tried that before? Because they can still be pretty awesome. I mean heck, we could all just pretend like we're drunk and probably have just a good a time, and not be regretting it in the morning. If I were in psychology, I would say that most of these people use it as an excuse to act a little crazy. But what if we all just decided to act a little crazy anyway ... boost up the confidence level a bit, be more comfortable with our awkwardness because we're all a little awkward. Worried that you don't dance well? I'm pretty sure majority of people don't dance well. With the right amount of creativity and excellent facial expressions I'm pretty sure people won't care if you're even in time with the music.

3. Girls Who ...
My suitemate and I have begun a list. It's more of a list of attributes we find rather destructive that we would not like to emulate, and feel are unhealthy for other girls to form. That being for themselves, for guys, and for the girls they leave in their wake. For example, girls who overtly flirt with many, many, many boys, and have very, very, very few close girl friends. It's probably obvious how the former effects the latter, and I could probably go on forever about how I think it's affected society. Yet I feel that throughout history women probably have used the same tactics, so this isn't anything new ...

4. Gunshots in songs? Who thought this was a good idea?!?
Paper Planes. I am morally opposed to this song. I don't even know what the point of it is, after reading the lyrics - which also makes me wonder what the younger generation even does with lyrics, but that's probably an age old question as well. But seriously, gun shots - like we don't desensitize our culture enough? I was at a party, of seminarians mind you, and the song comes one, the hand-shaped-like-a-gun goes in the air, and everyone has a good time. REALLY!?? All I could think was, if this was on in a club, and someone got shot outside, no one would know ... I just really, really do not like where this is going.

Words words words ...

My days have turned into something like this:
Wake up, go eat meal, read, go eat meal, read, go eat meal, read/realize I won't be able to focus on more reading so watch movie with friends. That is a lot of reading. And the hard part is most of the time I don't know if I actually understand it, and am dreading the idea of having to read it again. This usually has to happen as I go fishing for quotes to use in my paper.

It always makes you wonder as well, if you wrote like the authors you are forced to read, what kind of grade you would receive. I'm convinced that if I wrote a paper like Tillich writes, I would get an automatic rewrite. Not to mention he's used 'concupiscence' at least 5 times ...

e.g. from Michael Crichton's (RIP) history (via wikipedia):
Crichton admitted to having once, during his undergraduate study, plagiarized a work by George Orwell and submitted it as his own. According to Crichton, the paper was received by his professor with a mark of "B−". Crichton claimed that the plagiarism was not intended to defraud the school, but rather as an experiment. Crichton believed that the professor in question had been intentionally giving him abnormally low marks, and so as an experiment Crichton informed another professor of his idea and submitted Orwell's paper as his own work. ^[7] His issues with the English Department led Crichton to switch concentrations from English to anthropology.

And lastly, try to keep a straight face when your prof uses this in lecture:

de⋅my⋅thol⋅o⋅gize (demythologization)

/ˌdimɪˈθɒləˌdʒaɪz/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [dee-mi-thol-uh-jahyz] verb, -gized, -giz⋅ing. –verb (used with object)

1. to divest of mythological or legendary attributes or forms, as in order to permit clearer appraisal and understanding: to demythologize the music dramas of Richard Wagner for modern listeners

2.to make less mysterious or mythical so as to give a more human character to: to demythologize the presidency.

–verb (used without object)
3.to separate mythological, legendary, or apocryphal elements from a writing, work of art, historical figure, etc.

New Shoe New York

You may think I have an addiction to traveling to New York by now, but I tell you it is not ...

I visited yesterday to check out a church that I would like to do my field education at, called West End Presbyterian Church, just next to Columbia and Central Park. I met with the pastor earlier this year, as well as the current intern, and am pretty excited about the opportunity. It's very different from home/UPC: the congregation is very small and very diverse. But it almost makes it feel like a family! I am more or less excited simply for the opportunity to adventure into new territory and see what I can learn. And Spanish might be on that list ...

Bianca and I also got to see Atsuko, a friend we know from our summer travels/UPC as she and her husband Pat were in town for the NY marathon. I canNOt imagine running all over the city, let alone longer than 5 blocks ... kudos to all that do. I really only run away from things. I ALSO bought some sweet new kicks for $10!! unbelievable, please see below:
And lastly, a few highlights from this week:
In speech class yesterday we were each to read a piece of scripture, and mine was a part of the sermon on the mount. I would like to say that preaching is one of those things that I may be a little to critical about, because I feel like people should be both engaging with the text as well as real with the people they are speaking to. And this often doesn't happen. Too much theatrics makes it unrealistic and too human/buddy buddy removes the pure wisdom that the scripture can have. You know what I mean? So I'm hoping that the way I choose to read my piece falls in the good balance. Reaction? Let's just say that one peer of mine said that if I were to start a cult, he would join.

Oh, and I joined a contemporary worship group on campus called 'The Well' and I get to lead worship next tuesday! I've just realized that this is kind of a dream of mine ... getting to be on a worship team, and then actually getting to lead one night! Woohoo! I've got to go practice then ...

...should I have mentioned something about the elections and this momentous time in history? Because Obama is great, that is all acknowledged, but I'm ready to see what the next 4 years actually have to offer. And I'm a little pissed with Washington's voters on other issues.

Reading Week ... riiggghhhtttt ...

So midterms are this week. In preparation for that, the school gives us the week prior off - no classes, use this time to study. Study? Really? Alllll week? hmm ... I do have two papers, a take home midterm due and two in-class midterms upon my return, so it would probably be in my best interest. But when fellow students call it 'fall break' and the people you work for on campus laugh a little when you say you're going to study, it loses it's studious luster. Now don't get me wrong, I wrote a paper, I had full 5 hour study sessions ... here and there ... but who says that can't happen alongside a trip to NYC, another to Washington DC, and of course the highly anticipated release of High School Musical 3: Senior Year. Let's just say my week was rather phenomenal.

Met up in NYC with a friend for the day, visiting from Washington (state that is, they always seem to get that wrong over here ...) via Virginia. Took a free trip sponsored by the American Jewish Committee to the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum which I would highly recommend if you get the chance. In my opinion my visits to Dachau and Normandy were more impactful, but this one does a really good job of taking you through the Holocaust from multiple angles. However, this being on Thursday (and a 13hr trip) I wasn't quite in the zone to go see HSM3 midnight showing as some would expect me to - sorry to disappoint. BUT I did see it Friday, and I am very VERY pleased with the outcome. I recommend it almost as highly as a trip to the Holocaust museum ... almost ... I'm sorry, I just can't help myself ... I am more than a fan, and I am well beyond 15yrs old, but who cares ...

On Reading.

The words I never knew:

Anathematize:
a·nath·e·ma·tize [uh-nath-uh-muh-tahyz] -tized, -tiz·ing.
–verb (used with object)

1.	to pronounce an anathema against; denounce; curse.

–verb (used without object)

2.	to pronounce anathemas; curse.

Cupidity:
cu·pid·i·ty /kyuˈpɪdɪti/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[kyoo-pid-i-tee]
–noun
eager or excessive desire, esp. to possess something; greed; avarice.

Concupiscence:
con·cu·pis·cence /kɒnˈkyupɪsəns, kɒŋ-/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[kon-kyoo-pi-suhns, kong-]
–noun

1.	sexual desire; lust.

2.	ardent, usually sensuous, longing.

Thanks Augustine, I'll try and incorporate these into my growing vocabulary. Or maybe not.