Music and Poetry

Because some people know how to sing/say it better than I do.

Instead of a Show - Jon Foreman

I hate all your show and pretense
the hypocrisy of your praise
the hypocrisy of your festivals
I hate all your show

Away with your noisy worship
Away with your noisy hymns
I stop up my ears when your
singing ‘em
I hate all your show

Instead let there be a flood of justice
An endless procession of righteous living, living
Instead let there be a flood of justice
Instead of a show

your eyes are closed when you’re praying
you sing right along with the band
you shine up your shoes for services
but there’s blood on your hands

you turned your back on the homeless
and the ones that don’t fit in your plans
quit playing religion games
there’s blood on your hands

Ah! let’s argue this out
if your sins are blood red
let’s argue this out
you’ll be white as the clouds
let’s argue this out
quit fooling around

give love to the ones who can’t love at all
give hope to the ones who got no hope at all
stand up for the ones who can’t stand up at all
instead of a show
I hate all your show

Coming to God: First Days - Mary Oliver

Lord, what shall I do that I
can't quiet myself?
Here is the bread, and
here is the cup, and
I can't quiet myself.

To enter the language of transformation!
To learn the importance of stillness,
with one's hands folded!

When will my eyes of rejoicing turn peaceful?
When will my joyful feet grow still?
When will my heart stop its prancing
as over the summer grass?

Lord, I would run for you, loving the miles for your sake.
I would climb the highest tree
to be that much closer.

Lord, I will learn also to kneel down
into the world of the invisible,
the inscrutable and the everlasting.
Then I would move no more than the leaves of a tree
on a day of no wind,
bathed in light,
like a wanderer who has come home at last
and kneels in peace, done with all unnecessary things;
every motion; even words.

Janu-airy

Short terms are interesting. This is my first experience with one, and I'm not sure what I think about it. Cramming 10 weeks of information into less than 3 is quite a task, and staying awake for 3hrs of lecture every day does prove to be a challenge for me. I very greatly appreciate the class (Presbyterian History and Theology), but also the extra's that accompany this short term.

During a usual semester, we have the opportunity to attend Chapel every day at 11:30. But during the shorter term, we have morning prayer/evening prayer options. I decided to go to morning prayer the first week, which is itself dedication as it is at 8:30am - perhaps not early for you but early enough for me. :) The style of the service is from the Book of Common Prayer which in essence means high liturgy and very structured. My first impression was that it was rather dry - to read in response words printed for you on paper, to hear the monotonous voices surrounding you droning through the Apostle's Creed, and the pristine words of the speaker that have lost most of their conversational quality in the attempt to present a more holy atmosphere.

But is this not the epitome of judgement?

As I vented my self-righteous opinions about how I like to worship, Margaret was good enough to point out to me how much I was missing the point. What is worship? What does it mean to pray? What is prayer? I found myself swimming in the terrible current trend of 'what's in it for me?'. I can't stand that. I was looking for what I wanted. I was focusing on how I worship. I wasn't listening or praying about anything really, I was too distracted with what I wanted to get out of it. Why is there so much me all the time? How do I find myself there so often?

Well, I've been back. Every day. It has been glorious. I can't explain it, it's as though that first day I had the evil spirit of criticism hovering over my shoulder that wouldn't let me experience the Holy Spirit in that place. My mind open, my heart refreshed, the words on the page mean something different. The practice of speaking the scriptures with my brothers and sisters is a new experience. Worship and prayer are bigger than I am. How marvelous.

It makes me appreciate structure in some ways - how we may not want to do something, yet should do something. When we don't feel like praying, perhaps that is the best time to pray. Although I may not like the service at a church, let's look for God in it anyway, because He's there, and I just need to listen or pay attention. Let's all get off our high horses about wanting what we want, and try wanting what we've got.

As Time Goes By ... this is not your mother's british sitcom.

Nearly a month. And New Years passed. Weeks of leaving you in anticipation of what I'm up to (yeah right) + New Years MUST = countdown.

10. Christmas needs a caroling.


9. One of the times I tried to take the bus. As most of you know (like I really know who 'you' are) that Seattle has difficulty operating when it snows. The whole city suffers from this. But this day was just a little cold, and a little icy. So what gives? My bus was late. I had places to be. So I drove. But I still miss my old bus stop, almost as much as my bus missed me ... which was by about 10-15min. In any case, it wasn't as bad as the second time I waited, in a good deal of snow, for a shuttle that only appears once an however-long-it-takes-to-loop-the-neighborhood. Rescheduled THAT coffee date.

8. The San Diego Zoo has been an obsession, dream, and hope in the past 15 years of my life. This winter, that dream became a reality. And this is proof - a baby panda sleeping in a tree. It wasn't exactly like the interactive CD-ROM I received from my uncle so many years ago, it was simply better.
7. Sisters. This picture speaks for itself.
6. DISNEYLAND. AT CHRISTMAS. Need I say more? Aside from the fact that Nathan looks hilarious in this photo? Was he unprepared for the fun he was about to have that day? Possibly. Bonus: Innoventions - High School Musical Karaoke. You're right, I did need to say more.
5. Family attack! Let's just say the last time I slept in this house was when I was ... 5? That's much too long. I love my Aunt and Uncle. If you ever get a chance, visit Madrona Marsh. And if you ever get chance, play stinky pinky. It's a riddle/word game, that apparently means a lot of harsher things when you google it, so better just ask me about it ...
4. Family ... again ... and they should really be at #1 but since this is more of a timeline than a countdown, and they've already got #5 and #7, I think you get the picture. But really, THIS picture explains my family.
3. When I come home, I often smell like coffee shops. I actually went straight from Javasti to Zoka one day. But I love meeting with people! They are so interesting, you should get to know some. Catching up is the best. I am so thankful for the questions asked, the feelings expressed, the laughs shared, and the way my heart feels full.
2. That's one way to say goodbye - how often does Mt. Rainier actually show up to wave goodbye? My Great Aunt and Great...Cousin (?) have visited a number of times, and I think it was only on visit #4 that it actually showed up and wasn't covered in clouds.
1. And we're back. Class? Presbyterian History and Theology. Actually much more interesting than that groan you just let out. But I am here with a new perspective - reminded of what life at home is like, in some ways a refresher of who I am and what gives me life. And here I am asking myself if I'm living like that here. I think overall I feel a lack of spiritual fervor. I don't want to judge, and it's literally impossible when talking about other people's spiritual lives, but sometimes I just feel like theres a lack of energy for the gospel, no real recognition of the wonderful gift we have been given, first in Christ, and then in the fact we get to study all that follows from Him! I just want to see that faith is real to people. Maybe I need to show people that my faith is real to me.